September 23 ~ Mommys Worry ~ Random Thoughts

I never thought that I would be the worrying mommy. I thought that I would remain a level-headed, calm person. WRONG! The instant that I found out that I was pregnant, I began to worry. Would she "stick" and carry to term? Would she be healthy? Would labor be as bad as I thought it would be? Would it be worse?? Could I be a good mother? Could Eric be a good father? What is she had no hair? What is she was full of hair?? How long until the next ultrasound? And on and on...

I, naively, thought that when she was born that it would be over and I wouldn't have to worry as much! Ha! That was just the beginning! As soon as she was born and began to scream (yep, the very first night) with colic, I began to worry more than I'd ever thought possible. I worried about her crying, not crying. I worried about her eating enough, eating too much. I worried about her weight. Most of all, I worried (nearly to the point of obsession) about the risk of SIDS. I would check the thermostat to make sure that the room was a brisk 68 degrees. I would check her crib sheets to make sure that they were snug. Were her pjs too loose? Were they too tight? Would she be sad if she woke up and I wasn't there? I anxiously awaited the six month mark, the time when the risk of SIDS is reduced to almost nothing. When she hit that milestone, I threw myself a mental party! I thought, "Whew, worries over!"

For a smart person, sometimes I can be really dense! Worries . . . not over! Although I do believe that I am beginning to calm down (although don't ask my hubby if he thinks this is true!) I have learned that being a mother is part sheer, blinding love, part exhaustion, and part worry. Now instead of worrying about her survival, I worry about her learning to walk and getting into things not meant for babies. I have locked down everything possible. To go the the bathroom in this house, you have to basically be McGuiver. Jokes aside, I have also learned that to worry is to be a good parent. I know that when My little baby girl is grown and has her own little baby girl, I will worry. I will worry about her and love her. I will even teach her how to lock her toilet!

September 15 ~ Very Busy Lily!

At one week shy of eight months old, we have a VERY BUSY LILY on our hands!

She leaned to crawl two weeks ago. She was at her Meme and Pappy's house and just decided to go for it! Renita got it on video and sent it to us! What an amazing moment! We were anticipating her to do it at any moment, but it was still amazing! Few couple of tentative "steps" on Friday night grew into the Nascar racer version of crawling! She is fast, precise, and proud of her little self! She continues to have a knack for going after what she is not supposed to have! Mommy, Dadda, and all caretakers are really on toes now!

She is eating "meals" now. She has baby food at breakfast, lunch, and dinner with milk and snacks in between. My favorite feeding is when I get home from work. By that time, she is worn out from playing and ready to nurse and snuggle! We crawl up into the recliner and cuddle for about 45 minutes each afternoon. Amazing! My favorite part of the day. We both unwind together and love on each other.

One of Lily's new loves is paper! Newspaper, magazines, junk mail, etc are her favorite new interest! She loves to crinkle it and wave it about. We just have to watch closely as she'd also like to put it in her mouth!
Another love continues to the bath time! Now she even sits in the tub for awhile after I bathe her. She thinks that this is really top notch! She bangs her little hands and splashes the water all over! I sing to her while she splashes! How Much is That Doggie, Itsy Bitsy Spider, The Ants Go Marching, etc...
Also, she loves her teething baggie. Its mesh and she loves ice or bananas inside it. She will eat nearly a whole banana by sucking it out of the baggie.
She has also discovered that waving her arms, squealing, and thrashing about will keep her awake. The lets-fight-sleep game is a new discovery, much to Mommy's chagrin.
Meme and Pappy brought her a stuffed penguin from their vacation in California. Its beak is a favorite target of Lily's tiny teeth!

Speaking of teeth, Lily's two bottom pearly-white are precious! The top two are still working hard to make an appearance! I can feel them and see them right at the surface, but am still waiting for them to break through.

Being back at work has been both easier and harder than I expected. It's easier as Lily is with people that love her and she loves. I think that it is good for her to be exposed to all of these people who love her to bits: Meme, Pappy, Granny, Grampy, Jeanne, and Leah. It's hard because she is at the age where (just this week), she is developing some mommy separation anxiety where she cries when I leave the room. Heart. Breaking. I also get a little bitter that I have to leave my baby to go teach other peoples' babies. I just don't want to miss a moment!

Each stage of Lily's development I think is the most amazing, most precious, most enjoyable. My mom friends have told me that this happens, but it is another thing entirely to experience! She is AMAZING!